I keep telling myself things will be different this time. I insist that I won’t subject myself to the peer pressure of my self-destructive colleagues who clearly have far superior metabolisms. I set out well intended to write this column, in an effort to find delicious late night eats, but it is becoming a review of cheap, trash Chinese food. I’d love to think what I’m doing is more than merely plucking the low hanging fruit in an effort to fill up pages of Matt Brown’s trash rag. But at some point the rubber meets the road, and as of late that road has been Spadina. Hopefully I won’t feel like I need a rubber for this night’s dining experience, unlike New Sky and King Lobster. We enter Canton Chili.
It seems our presence is not welcome, almost immediately on arrival. I’m not sure if its the sight of Andrew Robertson, or the evil cackle from Brown as one member of our party shouts “cold tea” like a hip hop hype-man upon entry – its 12:30. We are savages nobody wants around. We are loud, crass, unapologetic and in fact, self-righteous. Its to our great benefit this evening that the staff of Canton Chili is welcoming and gracious, perhaps to the chagrin of their other patrons.
The interior of Canton Chili is much cleaner and more modern looking than the K(a)ng Lobster or New Sky. Further the staff seems about 20 years younger and has much less of the comedic, snake-oil salesman vibe we were getting at the other joints. Jennifer Bush, a new and greatly appreciated face in the mayhem seems to have a rapport with one of the waiters named Sam – a huge asset to our cause. These guys are straight shooters. Not only do they quickly accommodate with the cold tea, which due to the time is only much appreciated patronizing, but we are told that it is two beers per pot so we could order accordingly/know how much we are being charged.
Our meal starts off with wonton soup for the table. I’m not sure whether the soup was amazing or it was just the perfect antidote for the whisky soaked ache emanating from my belly. Either way a great start. As a point of comparison to the Kang and New Sky, we ordered the crispy ginger beef. The CC ginger beef was very flavorful and had welcome filler cooked into the dish. It was superior to the Kang’s version which is also pretty good. The General Tsao was too spicy for some in the party, but being a lover of spice I found it very enjoyable. Like the ginger beef, the CC General defeated the New Sky and Kang Generals with terrifying efficiency.
Our waiter Sam, goaded us into ordering a vegetable dish, recommending the baby bok choy. This led to a version of “Blue Tail Fly” being sung with the words “Jimmy crack corn” replaced with “baby bok choy”. Realizing now that that song is about a southern slave rejoicing over the death of his master after possibly having caused it by deliberate negligence, I can’t help but chuckle at the thought of us crackers (Albert Lin included) singing this song as we kill ourselves with cheap booze and unhealthy food. Nonetheless the bok choy was delicious, cooked al dente to leave just enough crunch. Thanks Sam.
The standout of the night was the seafood rice. Bush was all about it during the ordering phase, and thankfully we all deferred to her better judgment. So often fried rice dishes can have all the flavor lost in the oil the rice was fried in, but the CC seafood rice had all the flavor of the devoured sea creatures, without the typical heaviness. A great dish.
In a battle versus New Sky and King Lobster, Canton Chili wins easily. Good service, tasty food, and clean surroundings (relative to the other dives) made Canton Chili a great way to polish off our evening. And just to add a cherry on top we played credit card roulette. It came down with Brown vs. Bush, and just after Bush denied Matt’s offer to split the bill, Bush’s card gets pulled leaving Brownie to pay the tab. Thanks Canton Chili – 3.5 Beam shots out of 4.
