Sister Act 2: Back in the Habit. That’s right. The (self-proclaimed) James Dean of law school is back with more thoughtful thoughts. (I think R Kelly put it best when he said “Can I get a toot toot? Can I get a beep beep?”)
Randy Quaid helped save all of humanity in Independence Day yet Canada can’t even help protect him from the Hollywood star-whackers? Just another example of Jason Kenney undermining Canada’s humanitarian reputation at every turn. Not cool, Canada. Not cool.
I’d rather be a pirate than a cowboy. The cowboy life is much too dusty for my taste. That said, I’d rather date a cowboy than a pirate…pirates drink too much to make good boyfriends.
Why is it that I never fail to cry at a movie on an airplane, even the most cheesy and tasteless? It is a bit uncomfortable to have your seat neighbour look over to see what has you weeping like an emotionally unhinged lunatic, only to discover it is on account of Joe Manganiello doing one-armed chin-ups – but honestly, I was just so fracking impressed.
Remember how stop and rewind was way faster than regular rewind? What was that all about? I’m very passionate about this topic so feel free to approach me if you ever want to gab about it over itzakadoozies. But be warned, I have been known to go on for long-winded vhs-themed rants.
I’d rather be tied down to an anthill than have to fold fitted sheets. No, nix that. I think I use that expression too liberally – I don’t really want to be tied down to an anthill. From here on, I’m only going to say things I really mean, like “I’d rather be spelunking.” Doesn’t it look like a good day for spelunking?
Why don’t guys dance with their arms around the girls’ necks and girls with their arms around the guys’ waists? That makes much more height-appropriate sense, no? #feminism #myfirsthashtagever! #amIdoingitright? #maybeI’llsticktoemojis
I’ve heard people say that there needs to be a sarcasm font but I think what we really need is a Bill Cosby font. It bothers me that people don’t read my texts in that tone because it is in fact the way I say them in my head. #voicesinmyhead. #haveIgotthehangofityet? And while I’m on the subject, I wish Kate Genest would wear the Bill Cosby sweater that her grandma knit her to school every day. It’s kind of selfish that she doesn’t. #kategenestisselfish
Banana peels make the best weapons. Banana peels, and strings of sausages. For lasso-ing #lassoingpeoplewithstringsofsausages
Alright y’all, thanks for sticking with me through all of this. I will endeavour to be more thoughtful next time. Like Allen Iverson so aptly put it this one time, … well I don’t really remember just what he said but I think it had something to do with practice. #thisoneisforthejocks.
It’s been a slice.
