10 Things Tuition Could Buy

Aron Nimani

Lisana Nithiananthan (2L)

Welcome back law students! Isn’t it lovely to be hit with another year of school, another year of exorbitant debt? I mean, it’s not like you could have spent that money on anything else right?

…*crickets chirp*…

This year, the cost of one year’s tuition at this fine institution comes with a price tag of $30,230. Yes, that is the right figure. And no, don’t bother to pick your jaw off the floor. Seriously. It’ll be dropping a few more times once you realize just how much money you pay to be here. To illustrate the magnitude of that expense, listed below are ten things you could have spent your tuition money on.

  1. You could use $20,000 to have Game of Thrones author George R.R. Martin write you into and kill you out of his next book in the A Song of Ice and Fire series, and use the left over money to fly yourself and eight friends out to Dublin to take the GoT Tour, with a little over $300 left to spend at souvenir shops or pubs.
  2. According some studies (i.e. Google) you could hire anyone of: Ashanti, Jhene Aiko, Far East Movement, Hanson, Three 6 Mafia, Simple Plan, Gloriana, or Gucci Mane for your event.
  3. For the McFlurry fiend in all of us (or maybe just me), that’s 12,648 regular sized Mcflurries. Or a McFlurry a day for the next 34 years.
  4. Raptors fans could buy courtside season tickets for two, and still have over two grand left to spend on refreshments and merchandise.
  5. 15,267 iced capps from Tim Horton’s, amounting to a little over 41 years of the iconic Canadian beverage blessing your life.
  6. Two Harley-Davidson Forty-Eights, and a little under $4000 to spend on leather goods.
  7. A ten day, all-inclusive vacation for you and 12 friends. In the Bahamas, staying at Riu Palace Paradise Island Hotel’s Oceanfront Suites.
  8. A 2014 Ford Mustang, Chevrolet Camaro, Dodge Challenger, Subaru BRZ/Scion FR-S, Hyundai Genesis 2.0T, Fiat 500 Abarth, Mini Cooper, or a Mazda MX-5. All with money left over.
  9. A nice down payment on a lovely house or rental property.
  10. Approximately 340 shares in THI (Tim Hortons Inc).

Alternative ideas include paying off your undergraduate loans in full, travelling the world, and buying bars of gold. Alas, you cannot do any of these, because you simply do not have the money. But one can always hope!

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