Tajja Isen (1L)
You’ve leveled up. No more getting grilled on the uselessness of your undergrad degree. Now comes a question that seems much more benign: “How’s law school going?” But don’t be fooled by its simplicity or seduced by its accomplices, the Avuncular Tone and the Encouraging Smile. The question is a guise for various, often nefarious motives. It lurks in the wings of any social situation, with a far more sophisticated wardrobe than mere sheep’s clothing. The following guide, though not exhaustive, will help you spot and neutralize some of its common incarnations.
The First-year
Text: “How’s law school going?”
Subtext: “Have you started your maps yet? How much time did you spend on the memo? What did you say for reasonable reliance?”
Watch for: Vocal tremors; Red Bull; endearing attempts to be casual.
Don’t: Overshare. Not because they might steal your HH, but because it might push a little too hard on the exposed nerve.
The Upper-year (Part 1)
Text: “How’s law school going?”
Subtext: “I know the struggle is real right now. Are you good?”
Watch for: Tilted head; direct eye contact; strong hug-me vibes.
Do: Tell the truth—they’ve been there. Ask before hugging.
The Upper-year (Part 2)
Text: “How’s law school going?”
Subtext: “Following the principle of stare decisis, your law school experience will be as awful as mine.”
Watch for: Turned-down mouth; syrupy sympathy; a singsong tone to the question.
Do: Practice for the profession by massaging the facts.
Don’t: Call them out. You’ll need their summaries in a couple weeks.
The Grad Student in Another Discipline
Text: “How’s law school going?”
Subtext: “You look exhausted, but at least you’ll be rich.”
Watch for: A researcher’s curiosity tempered by fear; the sense of approaching, with hand outstretched, a dangerous creature behind bars.
Don’t: Dangle your job prospects.
The Recent Alum
Text: “Kid, I wouldn’t trade places with you for an SCC clerkship.”
Subtext: …
Watch for: Strong flavours of pity, with notes of envy on the nose.
Do: Add them on LinkedIn.
The Five-Year Call
Text: “How’s law school going?”
Subtext: “Everything turns out all right in the end.”
Watch for: Work-life (im)balance.
Do: Lurk them on LinkedIn, wondering if you networked hard enough to be memorable.
Your Mom
Text: “How’s law school going?”
Subtext: “Why haven’t you called me?”
Watch for: Openings to heavily imply your desire for a frozen lasagna.
Don’t: Cry.
The Holiday Relative
Text: “How’s law school going? Are you going to be one of those nice lawyers? It must be a ton of pressure. How are you even standing here right now?”
Subtext: “Are you regretting it yet?”
Watch for: The nearest supply of alcohol, the door, or both.
Don’t: Shoot back with “I don’t know, did people ask if you were going to be one of those nice dentists?” Actually, scratch that. Do it, but I abdicate any responsibility for the consequences.
Not Covered
The Friend with a 9-to-5, The Non-Law SO, The Prof, The Pizza Guy.
The Bottom Line
Remember how lucky you are to be here. The work it took to pull off proves the rightness of your arrival, but feel no need to say so out loud. Your journey is your own and you don’t need to justify it to anyone. Except during OCIs.
