Screendropping II: Facebooking a Mystery

Kevin Schoenfeldt

Okay, for any of you that follow me on Twitter, you might have seen my #mysteryatUTLaw posts before I had to delete them. Well, now I’m taking the added precaution of moving the whole thing here to Facebook. Call me paranoid if you want, but I have too many followers on Twitter for me to know for sure if “Gertrude” is lurking there. And if she is who I think she is, well… I don’t want to get caught in her web.

Some people have asked me why I don’t just stop investigating her. “Leave her alone,” my friends say. “You’re acting crazy,” my friends say. “She was in my small group and she’s really nice,” my friends say. Do you know what I say to that? Fuck nice. Everyone’s nice. This is TOO IMPORTANT. This #mystery MUST be solved!

For those who missed my tweets before I deleted them, let me catch you up. In class I saw this girl I’m calling Gertrude messaging a friend (“Paisley”) on Facebook and they were talking about cleaning SOMETHING up. Her friend was worried about whatever it was being found. So that’s what we’re talking about. Super suspicious, right?

Wait until you hear what’s been happening these last few weeks. Not every detail on its own is suspicious, but together I think you’ll have to agree they paint a pretty clear, and damning picture:

– Gertrude wasn’t in class for a week after that first day. Could she have been sitting behind me somewhere? I highly doubt it.

– I’m pretty sure I figured out who Paisley is and she’s a 1L. What is Gertrude doing chatting with a 1L? I do it sometimes but, you know, I’m really involved.

– I called the police to find out if there were any unsolved murders lately. They hung up on me. But that doesn’t mean there weren’t any!

– I followed Gertrude home once and there were two shovels on her front porch. GUYS!

– She’s been looking really tired lately and seems quiet. I think the guilt is weighing on her. The CDO’s all like, “If someone suddenly seems withdrawn, maybe they’re stressed out.” But I’m all like, “OR MAYBE THEY MURDERED SOMEONE.”

So that’s where we are now. I don’t have anything concrete yet, but I can feel it, this thing is about to blow wide open.

Be safe,

Sarah

 

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