Ultra Vires


The Top Ten Things You Absolutely Need to do this St Paddy’s Day

St. Paddy’s Day is around the corner, and Ultra Vires has the guide you need to make the most of your one opportunity to day-drink, wear green, and reveal your inner contempt for the Irish. Read on below to find out how to make the most of the day!

  1. Wear your favourite shamrock hat!
    No better way to show off all that spirit!
  2. Make Green Pancakes
    Like regular pancakes, but green! Your friends will love this new twist on an old classic. No better way to start the day!
  3. Drink Green Beer!
    Whoa! A solid twist on a St Paddy’s Day staple. Lagers or IPAs work best.
  4. Go to your friend Matt’s house and get ready to party!
    Fuck yeah! Sharing the day with your friends is the best part of St Paddy’s Day!!
  5. Ask him what he means when he says he can’t get drunk on the street with you again this year.
    But…we get drunk on the street together every year, Matt.
  6. Remind him that the bones healed decently enough and the judge agreed to probation.
    Besides, chicks dig scars. And ankle trackers.
  7. Maybe if you try crying a bit he’ll change his mind?
    But should you let Matt’s newfound sobriety stand in the way of your fun? Who’s to say?
  8. Ask if he has change for the TTC back to your house – you spent all your money on your shamrock hat.
    But it lights up, see? It lights up, Matt.
  9. Get home and realize you’re not in undergrad anymore.
    Go Mustangs?

Start Prepping for Canada Day!
You and Matt are going to have so much fun

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