While I personally have never made much of Valentine’s Day, the editing board of UV asked me to lend a singles perspective to the annual anniversary of teddy bears, chocolate and inorganic romance.
While the celebration of love on any day of the year is hardly something controversial, the holiday in theory is at odds with popular practice. The lead up to February 14th is inevitably met with unnatural pressure to express and share an emotion that is intended to be organic. Popular culture mandates expensive evenings of romantic elation, perfected by commercial acquisitions and Kodak moments that embody long lasting memories. Hallmark’s secret, of course, is that not every couple undergoes a marriage proposal on top of the Empire State Building every February 14th. The consequence is that many people – whether single or attached – emerge with feelings of disappointment and dissonance.
The happiest people I know around Valentine’s Day are those who manage their expectations. Busy couples who treat the holiday as an opportune reminder to spend some much needed time together rarely sport a frown on February 15th. Those of us who are single and happy are happy to point out that the holiday is manufactured, but rarely practice what we preach. Every sitcom on HBO tells us that February 14th is the time of year to pop out a bottle of wine, inhale huge quantities of Haagen Daas and start browsing OkCupid, but it is just as easy to be happy about who we are and raise a toast to our affectionate friends on their special night. After all, until we find the right person, being single is its own reward. Someday we too will be scrambling to line the pockets of predatory retailers constructing the perfect nuit d’amour.
So to all the couples out there, enjoy the roses and chocolate, but don’t let the holiday cause more stress than it diffuses. A happy Festivus to the rest of us.
